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“You can’t get a reservation at a feeder! First, it was the squirrels, and now it’s the bears.”
“Got real and fake burgers. Also, real and faux hot dogs. What time are the genuine and phony friends arriving?”
“We’re fabulously flabby, gabby, and seldom crabby.”
“Between the price of gas and flight cancellations, can we just camp out in your backyard?”
“We’re not in the kitchen; we’re on the pickleball court.”
“The bad news? There’s a tampon shortage. The good news? We’re post-menopausal.”
“Hey, you know what would be great? A swim-up bar.”
“I’m so over which under-eye concealer is best.”
“Good or bad, Yogurt Toast is trending on TikTok, and that’s that.”
“Peanut butter, chicken salad, fruit… So, what’s for lunch that hasn’t been recalled?”
