July 18, 2023 Winning “Today’s horoscope says you’re not interested in money or materialism. No worries if I win that lottery jackpot.”
May 22, 2023 Spaced Out “Your cousin just texted from the space station. Can you go unplug his toaster oven?”
December 6, 2022 Word “Goblin Mode is the word of the year, and for the last 364 days, I never heard of it.”
August 31, 2022 Gator Relator “Rarely snappy, Gary decides to become an emotional support alligator.”
July 30, 2022 Dry Lips “When Maxine learned lipstick has a melting point of 130 degrees Fahrenheit, she finally believed in the global climate crisis.”
July 26, 2022 Money Talks “Even If I win the Mega Millions, I will keep my job. My boss can’t find anyone for 23K a year with no benefits.”
March 25, 2022 Zone Offense “When you said you wanted to watch March Madness, I didn’t think you meant the nightly news.”
October 2, 2021 Slow Post “The USPS is slowing down mail delivery and raising stamp prices. We’re finally off the holiday-photo-card hook!”