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“Everybody would be poor if he’s impeached. So glad we snagged a Never Ending Pasta Pass.”
“Barnum’s Animal Crackers are now cage-free. We’ve got cage-free boarding, but our dog treats are still locked up on the counter.”
“NYU Medical school is waiving tuition for their students. Hope my doctor waves a $730.00 bill for 37 seconds of not listening.”
“You’re always hollering about my donuts and that wholesome cereal has weedkiller.”
“When you grilled the hell out of the burgers, after everyone told you medium rare.”
“She taped it, he tweets. Calls her a ‘dog’ and a ‘lowlife’ – now the campaigns’ gonna sue. Not the Real Housewives of New Jersey – It’s the real politics of Washington.”
“Space Force? How about a Road, Bridge & Pothole Force – As seen from space.”
“All burgers are served with fries, slaw, onion rings and a pickle. There’s your vegetable-centric dish.”
“California’s wildfires have been devastating; toxic smoke, toxic ash, and now toxic tweets.”
“They’re rolling back fuel efficiency standards – Because gas-mileage and clean air are so overrated.”
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