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“The holidays are coming, where can we go to escape the family?”
“From now until April, everything, and I mean everything, will be coming out of this one pot. Over and out.”
“Sheila sat in the good chair, picked up the remote, and made everyone watch her dopey shows. This inspired the rest of the family to join bowling leagues.”
“Does getting up a few times a night to tinkle count towards my daily 10,000 steps?”
“Forget finding a nice guy, I’m trying to find a good Primary Care doctor.”
“Don’t forget to turn your clocks and donuts back one hour.”
“When your kids and all the neighborhood kids are all grown and gone, make sure you have candy corn martinis for self-care.”
“We’re running late. Someone cast a spell on our car battery.”
“At this age, I don’t care about fashion trends, social crap, and having to explain myself… But where we go to lunch matters.”
“Listen, LaBoobie, you’re not borrowing my slippers for your costume.”
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