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“Turned my clock and donut back one hour.”
“Three hours in a crowded orchard with screaming kids and their crazy parents; a fall family tradition.“
“What do you mean it’s one gourd too many?”
“I’m tired of their constant clucking with no solutions. That’s my beef. OMG – I said the ‘B’ word.”
“Pumpkin Spice toilet paper and toilet bowl cleaner; you don’t have to thank us.”
“Whelp, it’s four o’clock somewhere.”
“Oh, we’re wearing white after Labor Day… and there’s not a darn thing you can do about it.”
“I’m totally over being positive all the time.”
“Would you please tell your father it’s not a DIY project if he’s involving me?”
“Let’s toast to another week of crazy.”
