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“These home apps are enabling us to never leave the house. Maybe we should go outside or something.”
“Phyllis & Mona order Bone-Strong Margaritas; quickly discovering that tequila & soy-milk don’t mix.”
“What tax cuts? Our state was blue, no refund for you.”
“Just when you Marie Kondo’d my Bernie 2016 tees, hat, and banner… He announces a 2020 run.”
“Shutting down the government, and now declaring a National Emergency for border wall billions. What in the Sam Hill is going on? We’ll hold. ”
“They may have scrapped NYC- but our condo always feels like Amazon headquarters.”
“Phyllis always bought her own Valentines, her own candy, and her own bouquets. This year she finally bought out her spouse.”
“Valentine’s Special; You-Never-Help-Around-The-House Salad, Little-Appreciation-Appetizers, Micromanage-Me-Meatballs, and Your Family-Drives-Me-Nutella for dessert.
“Hula-hoops, toga parties, streaking, and now everyone’s running for president. These fads come and go.”
“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways: Three electric brooms, two upright vacuums , and one hundred lint rollers later.”
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