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“Ugly cabinets. Zero storage. No counter space. Funky floors. My universe.”
“Tie-Dye, Neon & Fanny Packs are baaack! Take that Marie Kondo.”
“It’s from the boss,’Printer is jammed. Deleted my presentation. Phones are going crazy. Are you near the office? ‘ Seriously? This is too funny!’
“Time for all cleaning & clutter articles to transfer over to the men’s magazines… And take that tasty weeknight recipes fold-out too.”
“The closet organizer blew my cover. That’s when he learned the hard truth about my handbag collection.”
“I woke-up with a headache, I’m having my coffee, and then I’ll be at your egg hunt. Problem, Karen?”
“Men’s beards are dirtier than dog fur. There’s a treat involved if you get yourself to a groomer.”
“Wine, salad, and the whole bread basket works for me too.”
“Alexa- ask the thousands of Amazon employees who are listening – why no gift cards for my birthday? I’ve only mentioned it like fifty times.”
“Last time greedy parents tackled little kids for candy. This year we’ve got collision insurance, and they have to sign waivers.”
