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“See the patio umbrella, be the patio umbrella, receive the patio umbrella.”
“Nothing can be done with three pounds of potato salad, two s’mores, and one hot dog. The Dinner-Spin-It app says just grab the car keys & the chips.”
“This year Nana spent all her money on insulin. Now Nana’s vacation is watching this #@$# tank parade.”
“They left me all alone with my fireworks anxiety. Gonna live-stream; Stress chewing, nervous peeing, and getting into their CBD oil stash.”
“Toxic algae bloom closed the beach. Unhealthy poop bacteria found in the pool. And the public toilet at the bus station won an award.”
“Who knew three years ago we’d be living in the burbs? All you can eat seeds, swimming pools, and our cubs love the swing-sets.”
“Bold prints paired with large totes. We don’t need no stinkin’ cover-ups.”
“Before we get into vacation photos, amazing pets, and cute grandchildren – let’s talk politics, religion, sex, and money.”
“The kids waited 10 hours in raging storms for this new Harry Potter ride. They’d better also line up for the 2020 political roller-coaster.”
“When I hear, ‘How many bags & shoes do you need?’ As many as my closet and 17 storage containers can handle.”
