Landfill Latte

“Goes green by riding her bike to get coffee – Then puts plastic footprint in mouth with single use cup, straw, stirrer and two creamer thingies.” 

Closet Closed

“Trust & control are relationship red flags. Never ask us how many handbags we need – when we’ve worked for them.” 

Sit.Stay.Chew

“Rusty, it’s schlocky movie night. Fox News, CNN, and that 24/7 shopping channel just leads to growling, howling, and begging.” 

Zilch

“Zero federal infrastructure fixes, zero health care plans, zero gun control, zero environmental efforts. The zeros are really adding up.”