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“After changing all the clocks and replacing all the alarm batteries… I actually lost two hours of sleep.”
“I switched it from the Mermaid theme to a Make-Your-Own-Hand-Sanitizer party.”
“Pickleball Stages of Life: Beginner, Intermediate, Advanced Icing & Hydrating.”
“Another Fed rate cut. Trained economists or Magic Eight Ball? Reply hazy, try again.”
“Nothing special. Just socially distancing myself from the general population. You?”
“Ms. Davenport, we’re here to listen and address all your critical pandemic questions. And yes, hazmat is a valid Scrabble word.”
“Not J.Lo’s bikini challenge. Just me trying on clearance bras.”
