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“Like garbage bags in the can, so are the days of our lives.”
“This is a monthly subscription box; if you want anything in it – that’s extra.”
“I got Basmati, Jasmine, Arborio, Brown, and Wild… so don’t tell me I’m always making the same old rice.”
“Another day, another store-bought rotisserie chicken masterpiece.”
“I bought twenty-four boxes of conversation hearts because texting with my husband is ridiculous.”
“Thank goodness for the Super Bowl. I needed a day off from healthy snacks.”
“I know you’re down the hall, but I suddenly felt nostalgic for our old Zoom calls.”
“I’m having tea, and he’s on a sports betting app gambling away your inheritance.”
“The groundhogs predict six more weeks of number-one ratings for their podcast.”
“Pick up your dirty clothes; I’m turning the shower into a spa.”
