Aisle Five

“Granola bars, Krispie Treats, cookies, trail mix… Our kids are thirty, but who can resist Back-to-School snacks on sale?” 

Meat over Matter

“They’re on this whole pet parents’ kick. We’re not dogs; we’re fur babies. I’m like, whatever, share the burgers.”

Winning

“Today’s horoscope says you’re not interested in money or materialism. No worries if I win that lottery jackpot.”

Zero Proof

“Mocktails are expensive because they have complex flavors, decorative ice cubes, and cucumber ribbon garnishes. So worth it.” 

Canine Teeth

“Listen, Sheila, Rusty, and I tolerate the toothbrushing, but you wanna floss? Start with yourself.”