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“I have involuntarily arrived at the comfort shoe, giant sun hat, daily crossword stage of life.”
“Raising a glass to all the moms, grand-moms, pet moms, bonus moms, foster moms, aunts, like-a-moms, and those who have lost their mom.”
“Not J.Lo’s bikini challenge. Just me trying on clearance bras.”
“The office holiday party is now cancelled because of #MeToo. Instead, we’ll all see an inappropriate bonus in our paycheck.”
“Highly rated on Yelp and Google. TripAdvisor feedback is spot-on. Amazon reviewer rank is unparalleled. This has been a paid campaign ad from your mother. Call me!”
“The first all-female spacewalk. Unlike us, they didn’t need three Grande Lattes to step out.”
“Cake Mix Hacks. Beer Can Chicken With A Twist. Decorate & Marinate… Gonna miss you Family Circle Magazine.”
“I decided I really do have a knack for complaining. My podcast starts Monday.”
“Trust & control are relationship red flags. Never ask us how many handbags we need – when we’ve worked for them.”
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