Skip to content
“The hottest day on earth just happened. So I made some iced tea.”
“Pickleball noise complaints are up. Stop yelling, “Out!”
“We have hot dogs, chips, and beer. Not because it’s traditional, because we’re sick of salad.”
“Four kinds of salads, three kinds of burgers, and two of us. Good job forgetting to put the time on our invite.”
“For crying out loud, eat the donut. Our PCP appointments aren’t until a year from now.”
“I’m totally about positivity, trusting the universe, and gratitude. Now can I get five frickin’ minutes to meditate?”
“Your cousin just texted from the space station. Can you go unplug his toaster oven?”
“Boob sweat, dry, cracked feet, humidity, melting make-up, ingrown hairs… I love summer.”
“I’m a hands-free, crossbody, fanny-packin’, sling baggin’ kinda gal.”
“They switched out classic iced cubes for ice nuggets without consulting me. I know, right?”
