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“I haven’t played Wordle. I prefer that old Pop-O-Matic thingy and dice game.”
“Ranch dressing this and balsamic that. Meanwhile, French dressing hasn’t been seen in years.”
“TV characters are suffering heart attacks on fitness bikes. Probably too many onion rings.”
“Everything’s weird. Let’s toast to that.”
“Landline old is a thing.”
“When your cousin in Cleveland sends you Florida oranges in Florida.”
“Two bathroom trips and one hour of negative-self talk later Gloria realizes it’s only 3:15 AM.”
“I’m having tea, and he’s on a sports betting app gambling away your inheritance.”
“No worries about remote work and productivity. I’m 100% on task in slippers and PJs.”
“The only thing more riveting than an HOA meeting is a virtual HOA meeting.”