Skip to content
“We’re having a heatwave, a tropical heatwave… Who’s with me?”
“When Maxine learned lipstick has a melting point of 130 degrees Fahrenheit, she finally believed in the global climate crisis.”
“Even If I win the Mega Millions, I will keep my job. My boss can’t find anyone for 23K a year with no benefits.”
“Listen, Mindy, Daddy, and I can only cover an engagement party or Springsteen tickets. Pick one!”
“TikTok’s iced-coffee hack paired with an Instagram appetizer while wearing paid promotions for a YouTube video.”
“When sharks verbally attack.”
“Hello, HOA? For $315 bucks a month, can we switch out the shredded wheat for Lucky Charms’ green grass?”
“I’ve been trying to spend money all day, but everything’s sold out.”
“OK, TikTok has a new way to store lettuce. This is what you meant by let’s spice things up?”
“You can’t get a reservation at a feeder! First, it was the squirrels, and now it’s the bears.”