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“It’s officially the end of summer when Brenda gets pool noodles for 70% off.”
“Life is passing us by. Look, Halloween stuff is already out.”
“We have hot dogs, chips, and beer. Not because it’s traditional, because we’re sick of salad.”
“The virtual reality series, Hydrants of the World – took their mind off the fireworks.”
“No Hawaiian rolls? Where are the pickles? Why are they late? What are you doing inside?”
“They sent some Home Spa kit. Two eye thingies and a loofah to exfoliate my tough exterior.”
“After the Easter Bunny turned fifty, there was no more hippity hoppity down the trail.”
“Red Vines, wine, and potato chips… Time to celebrate Galentine’s and Valentine’s Day.”
“The groundhog phones it in… Six more weeks in Aruba.”
“Stop saying you’re overstuffed! I told you to order the XXL racing tee.”
