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“NYU Medical school is waiving tuition for their students. Hope my doctor waves a $730.00 bill for 37 seconds of not listening.”
“You’re always hollering about my donuts and that wholesome cereal has weedkiller.”
“My Honey Smacks cereal was recalled. Then McDonald’s recalled my salad. So dinner is totally stressing me out.”
“Harmless on land, when armed with aquatic dumbbells and a noodle – Sheila was chlorinated chaos.”
“I just got a badge for hitting 10,000 steps. Now I’m going to Uber home.”
“Our hotel resort fee better include pool water testing.”
