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“What will be available first? A vaccine or Clorox Wipes?”
“See the patio umbrella, be the patio umbrella, receive the patio umbrella.”
“We’d be done already if these defiant covididiots wore masks. It’s DUMB-‘O’clock somewhere.”
“Low income housing wouldn’t work here – the green fees alone. Keep America’s golf course communities great.”
“Mooning over Dr. Fauci? With his slick facts & research… And I thought you were my misinformation soul mate.”
“Nothing like a hand sanitizer recall in the middle of a pandemic. Now which U.S. retailers need their mouths washed out with soap for carrying toxic products?”
“Marking you totally unprepared for this pandemic. Write 50 times: Will not open school when my convention has been canceled.”
“Hello – I’m a retired History of Western Civilization teacher. This is Portland not Poland.”
“U.S. coronavirus outbreak will get worse before it gets better? Began with baking banana bread. Now zucchini. Pumpkin bread season’s gonna be swell.”
“Other than daily twisted messaging, stress & turmoil… Everything’s dandy.
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