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“What’s the deal with Labradoodles, Goldendoodles & Schnoodles? They don’t shed, they trend.”
“You’ve got a point Peaches. We always dumped you at doggie daycare, then went to the beach. Fine, stay on the chair.”
“You’re doing it again.You’re barking very loudly. I know you’re stressed – but chewing up every toy is punishing me.”
“These people are driving me nuts. More walks & junk food debris are the only perks.”
“Pookie – it’s time to go out for your last poop of the year or your first poop of the decade.”
“I’m in full crisis management here — Just ran out of poop bags.”
“Your side hustle as an Instagram pet influencer is at odds with our ‘Big Eight’ accounting firm culture.”
“Rusty, it’s schlocky movie night. Fox News, CNN, and that 24/7 shopping channel just leads to growling, howling, and begging.”
“This call is an official final notice. We have filed a lawsuit. Call now for immediate payment with a dry kibble wire transfer.”
