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“Maxine acknowledges climate change when she learns lipstick has a melt point of 130 degrees Fahrenheit.”
“Boob sweat, dry cracked feet, melting make-up, ingrown hairs…. I love summer.”
“We’ve lived six decades without it, so why is full-body deodorant suddenly a thing?”
“Pick up your dirty clothes; I’m turning the shower into a spa.”
“I’m in the middle of a hydrating active renewal facial treatment. Please wait 30 minutes for all annoying questions.”
“Whelp, I don’t give a flying flip if we’re saggin’, draggin’, or jigglin’… Who’s with me?”
“Boob sweat, dry, cracked feet, humidity, melting make-up, ingrown hairs… I love summer.”
“They sent some Home Spa kit. Two eye thingies and a loofah to exfoliate my tough exterior.”
“Post-yoga matcha tea with a vegan brownie. I’m at one with the universe and baked goods.”
“Embracing the gray, the eye bags, and the donut… Enjoying some sprinkles with my wrinkles.”
