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“The virtual reality series, Hydrants of the World – took their mind off the fireworks.”
“I don’t think he has rabies, but he does want to trade an acorn for my water bottle.”
“Girl, stop apologizing for the egg prices… Peck those suppliers, OK?”
“The groundhog phones it in… Six more weeks in Aruba.”
“Stop saying you’re overstuffed! I told you to order the XXL racing tee.”
“Listen, Sweetie, who needs me when you can do Ina Garten’s make-ahead Coquilles St. Jacques for Thanksgiving?”
“With a cluck-cluck here and a cluck-cluck there, E-I-E-I-O. Stop me if you’ve heard this one.”
“No, you can’t. Even with pet insurance, they still get to pick the vet.”
“Rarely snappy, Gary decides to become an emotional support alligator.”
“You can’t get a reservation at a feeder! First, it was the squirrels, and now it’s the bears.”